It’s February. Which means, you know, Valentines day. I have a tourettes-like response to it’s mere mention. A gag reflex and an overwhelming desire to shout obscenities at strangers.

I don’t know why this is. Perhaps it has its roots in the hell that was secondary school love angst. (Will I get a card?.. Shall I send a card… Will somebody post dog poo through my letter box?.. OMG I GOT A CARD *phones all friends*… Oh. Its from my Dad…I HATE MY DAD….*sits on inflatable chair and cries into Leonardo DiCaprio poster*)

Illustration by Ellie Sutton

This aversion to all things Valentines is odd for me because at any other time of year I’ll use any excuse to celebrate. Passed an exam? Brunch! Had a shit week? Fry up! St whatsists day? Party! Commiseratory dinners, congratulatory afternoon tea’s, pity parties and apologetic lunches; whatever the occasion (or lack thereof) I’m there with balloons. But for some reason, Valentines grates on me.

The traditional options are not great. If you’re single; you could get hammered alone or with other single friends. Or watch a Richard Curtis film whilst curled up in the fetal position in flannel pyjamas. Or if you are in a relationship; try and book a table in a restaurant only to find that they are ALL booked and/or extortionately expensive. Then spend the evening looking around at the other couples who are sat within spitting distance whilst the staff incessantly sell you expensive wine and champagne with James Blunt warbling away at you in the background.

Illustration by Alison Day

Sound good? Thought not. (I sound like a love Scrooge, I definitely have issues)

I banned my mister from engaging in any form of commercial Valentines celebration right at the start of our relationship, and we’ve ended up with a fish and chips dinner tradition instead, which I am actually quite fond of.

But if you MUST release your inner schmaltz, here are some alternatives to cheap chocolates and teddybears. Don’t get me started on teddybears.

Illustration by Ellie Sutton

Firstly, if you are in a relationship, probably best not too buy a card from the supermarket. Or the corner shop down the road. Or the petrol station. It takes very little effort to make something and its much more thoughtful. How about writing a letter? It doesn’t have to be a love letter, and its nicer than a brief scrawl in a card. Or what about a stick man comic strip or a flip book? We can all draw stick men. See? No excuse.

If you hate the idea of making something yourself, there are a whole host of talented illustrators and makers out there who will happily fulfill all of your home spun looking Valentines needs. Check out some ideas in Amelia’s article over here.

I discovered via Twitter that Abby Illustrator and her boy are having a living room picnic, which sounds lovely to me and much nicer than the aforementioned Blunt-warbling-restaurant-nightmare.

If you are planning on buying flowers for a loved one (it could be a friend, your lover, your mum..) then … think again. Sorry for the eco rant but growing and transporting flowers uses a huge amount of carbon, especially if they are from overseas. If you must indulge in some floristry delights then look up British grown flowers.

Or, heres a wee crafty idea; give someone a pack of wildflower seeds. Decant into an attractive envelope, sew (or glue) on to a piece of card and illustrate with an appropriately cheesy message. (as this grows it’ll be a symbol of my love. PUKE. My love is like this red red rose. VOM. etc etc)

And for a healthy alternative/addition to a box of chocolates, pretty up a punnet of red fruit and decorate with little flags.

Cook a pink dinner. Beetroot soup to start. Rare steak with a tomato salsa dressing. Kir Royals or Rose wine. Red velvet cake for pudding, or pink macarons or strawberry angel delight… This would be lovely for one, two or twenty two.

Make cookies. Just for the hell of it. Give to colleagues, friends, family members. Or, of course, your loved one. Dust with icing sugar for a chic minimalist finish or get into an e- number frenzy with coloured icing. Home made and cheap.

Go to see Grayson Perry talk about kinky sex. Hold on to your hats.

Send a You’re rad/I like you/love note to your friends and family. Last year I sent mini valentines cards to the female members of my family just to tell them that I think they are rad, and the reasons why.

Illustration by Alison Day

Visit Love from Darkroom, an exhibition raising money for the brilliant charity Kids Company. All of the art pieces are under £150 and it runs till 14th February. Read Amelia’s full listing here.

Host a horror night. My mister and I are planning on spending the Saturday before Valentines working through some early horror films (Nosferatu, Invasion of the Body Snatchers, The Birds, Night of the Living Dead…) Nothing like a bit of flesh eating Zombie action to get you in that Valentines mood.

Join the Craftivist Collective in hijacking Valentines day and show some love for your global neighbour. Write letters to strangers and make a Tatty Devine key ring then leave them for strangers to pick up. (see separate listing here)

Why not send your loved one an anatomically correct bleeding heart cake by Lilli Vanilli; the creator of the fabulous ACOFI launch party masterpiece? They are made from red velvet sponge, cream cheese frosting and blackcurrant & cherry ‘blood’. I love them and they are a steal at £7.

Image via Lili Vanilli’s blog

Watch Fuck. Not the real thing, gracious no, unless that’s your thing. I’m talking about the documentary which features interviews with the world’s best swearers including Billy Connolly and Ice-T. Hurrah for obscenities!

Visit the Valentines exhibition at the wonderful Museum of Brands, Packaging and Advertising. This is one of my favourite London museums and this exhibition is all about the culture and history of valentines cards.

Take your loved one on a ‘haunted london’ ghost tour instead, and see the grizzlier side of Londons history…

Go on a night safari with the Natural History museum: You can choose either one of 2 experiences, depending on whether you think Valentine Day is a pleasure or a pain. Both look at the different aspects of Love in the Natural World.

See? Valentines doesn’t have to be a pile of sick. There’s lots of fun stuff to do whether you are in a relationship or not. Or there’s always the pyjama option too…

And so, even I, say to you Happy Valentines day!

You may think that Christmas cards are harmless tokens of festive cheer, but there is more to them than well wishing tacky Santa’s. When done well, with thought, they have the potential to convey festive cheer, bring good news and even re-kindle relationships. They can also, however, be completely pointless (dear Dave from Sam. Why bother) cause large levels of guilt, highlight your own lack of organization, and generate sit-com levels of gossip and rumour (“Drunken Unkle Nigel is SO off the list”). Manufacturing and sending Christmas cards wastes thousands of tonnes of carbon every year, and most of the cards end up in landfill anyway.

Illustration by Daria Hlazatova

In fact, you might very well decide simply not to send them, and I really don’t blame you. (Full of Christmas cheer, I am.) Alternatively, to be slightly less of a scrooge, you could join me in making just a few cards, to accompany presents or perhaps as presents.

Illustration by Ellie Sutton

Here are a few ideas for some very simple and quick home-made cards that anybody could make, (even if they don’t consider themselves to be very crafty.) They are made with materials that most people will have lying around or within easy reach, and are designed to be very simple to make. A home- made card will be received much more warmly than a selection from an Asda multi pack, it will save lots of money, and making them is bound to make you feel festive. So stick some cheesy Christmas music on, pour yourself a glass of mulled wine and get stuck in.

Illustration by Ellie Sutton

Firstly, the easiest of them all, the potato stamp. Oh how I love the humble potato stamp! (I have written about the joys of potato stamping before ) A great craft to do with kids, its also fun for a big kids (ahem) and you can produce loads of cards very quickly.

Carefully carve your potato with a knife into the shape you desire. Get your card ready first then stamp away. Decorate with sequins, doodles, pressed flowers, or buttons, as above. You can buy recycled card here.

Save your wrapping paper and cards, cut them into little triangles then stick them across pre folded card with glue to make festive mini bunting. I saved the gold paper above from a birthday present and it has come in very handy for my Christmas cards. If you don’t fancy your chances at fancy handwriting, print your Christmas message out in a nice font.

I googled origami Christmas trees and found these easy to follow instructions. I recycled newspaper, the pages of an old book and some old maps and folded them into these Christmas cards/decorations. I used a few dabs of glue to secure the folds then strung each tree with a bit of thread and wrote my Christmas message on the back.

Here I have used up some of my tiny fabric scraps (which I keep) to cut out triangles to make into mini trees.

And if you REALLY don’t fancy your creative chances, then just print your cards. I have shamelessly stolen this idea from my friend, but he doesn’t’ mind my plagiarism (I checked). Pick your words, pick a nice font (you can get some great ones online, like here ), then play with the margins on a word document to position the words in the bottom right quarter of the page. Put some appropriately festive card in the printer and your done. If you don’t have a printer at home- you could borrow a friends (or sneakily use the one in the office. Shh)

• For envelopes, how about recycling magazine pages? My doorstep is currently full of Christmas catalogues. Tutorial here
• Remember also that you could also send an E Card if the mood takes you. Use the designs from the clever people at 10:10, or if you are a decent drawer (hello illustrators) then you can draw something amazing and send it as an e-card. Or how about a video card with a stop frame animation? Lots of effort but WAY COOL.
• Recycle any cards you do receive for gift tags and other decorations next Christmas
• Keep decent wrapping paper too, it comes in very useful for a number of crafty purposes, including the projects above.

I’ll be back later this week with some more ideas for home made Christmas fare, and a wee bit of a rant.

Happy festive season to you, dear readers.

Maybe theres something in the air, maybe its my age or maybe its the season but it seems everybody around me has suddenly spawned. Friends have started to have babies, and family members are producing them faster than I can count them.

By Michelle Urvall Nyren

I am also a little south of skint, so my meagre craft skills have come in pretty handy. I recently made a baby mobile out of stuff lying around my flat. It was easy, free and convenient , so I thought I’d show you how to make one.

You’ll need:

Wire coat hanger
Fabric (I used an old running t shirt, denim cut offs, and some other fabric I had lying around)
Ribbon, if you have any
Scissors
Glue
Buttons (Optional)

Firstly, bend a wire coat hanger into a circle. Easier said than done. I found that laying it on the table and beating it into submission with a hard object worked best. Wrap some thin strips of fabric around the wire coat hanger, using a dab of glue every few wraps to secure it.

To make the part that will attach to the ceiling, plait 3 strips of fabric 3 times. Then attach the three plaited strips evenly around the fabric covered wire frame, using glue or a staple or a few stitches.

Cut your strips of ribbon and fabric to the same width and length, then fold the top of each strip of fabric around the fabric covered wire frame, using a dab of glue to secure each strip.
To make sure none of the lengths of ribbon fall from the frame, you could also add a few stitches to each strip too.

This is easy enough to encourage little hands to help you do it, as I did with my creation above. I fashioned the wire and plaited the three strips that attach to the ceiling, and my little assistent attached the individual strips to the frame. You could neaten it by hemming the fabric, or using only ribbon, or keep it rough and ready. Parents will appreciate the time you put into it and babies will love the colours and the way it moves. And, more importantly, it doesn’t add to the inevitable pile of growing tacky plastic crap, either. Winner.

This column attempts to provide lovely ways to recycle junk into useful and beautiful things. If you have a genius recycling idea or if you are stuck with something you don’t want to chuck away, leave a comment and let me know! I may feature your idea or I will try and come up with a solution to your recycling conundrum.

In June, Amelia’s Magazine previewed Just Do It: get off your arse and change the world, a feature documentary (in production) from Age of Stupid Executive Producer Emily James. At the time of writing, Just Do It had just launched their innovative crowd-funding scheme to help raise the final funds required to complete the film for release in early 2011. From October 12th and for the next 18 days (this article was posted on 14th October) Lush Cosmetics will match all donations made to the Just Do It website POUND FOR POUND! The challenge? To raise 20K in 20 Days.

You might be wondering why a feature film is asking for money now, rather than at the box office? The answer is surprisingly simple, Just Do It will be released for free under creative commons across the internet, your donation today means people across the world will be able to watch it for free, forever. The other reason the film needs your support is Just Do It is a completely independent production – there are no TV/Film backers, a decision carefully made by Emily James in order to protect the rights and the representation of the activists who kindly let James film their actions over the course of two years from the G20 to those sad talks in Copenhagen.

Meet the Team!

And whilst you’re at it why not sign up for The Crude Awakening action happening this very Saturday? That’s right, as well as putting your money where your mouth is, you can put your feet there too…

Just Do It introduces those of you unaware to the adventurous and inspiring world that is UK Climate Change Activism. A cause that has been documented, reported and championed in these very pages in the Earth Section established by Amelia Gregory. It is a cause that needs your help and your support – watch the trailer, the bike bloc and the guide to Climate Camp. Watch all the videos and if you feel inspired and want to know what to do next, the answer is multifold. First you can visit the website, donate and find out how you can get involved if your time rich but cash poor…

Transition Heathrow

The Crude Awakening is a mass action aimed at waking up the oil industry, to the responsibility they owe the earth. There are three different mass actions to get involved in – click on the links to find out more about each, and to sign up to receive SMS texts as the action takes place, from 10am this Saturday 16th October…

Dirty Money Bloc – Drawing attention to the involvement of BANKING in the oil industry, for example RBS has been linked to extremely devastating practice of mining the Canadian Tar Sands. If you like the sound of holding your own space and being creative to beat the oil industry… If this sounds out like your bag, find out where to meet here.

Photograph Courtesy of Amy Scaife

Building Bloc – The building and occupying of space through structures expressing dissent at the unchecked flow of both oil and finance. If you have a head for heights and want to be actively involved, click here to find out more…

Finally the Body Bloc celebrates the “carnival of life, death, fun and resistance.”
Do you have an imaginative idea of life beyond (and without) oil and wish to turn the impossible possible? Find out more here.

Illustration by Faye West

So that’s two things you can do alongside your recycling – the first is find out how you can support Just Do It and the second is to support A Crude Awakening on Saturday 16th October.

The Mooncup is a menstrual cup. Yep, a rubber cup that collects period blood. To the uninitiated I accept that this sounds a little gag-worthy – but before you slam your laptop shut in disgust, allow me to explain why I, and thousands of other women like me, have fallen in love with the Mooncup.

Firstly, a few facts about sanitary waste. Did you know that 200,000 tons of sanitary towels, panty liners and tampons are thrown and flushed away, ultimately ending up in landfill every year? Normal tampons and pads are pumped full of pesticides, bleach and toxins which have been linked to Toxic Shock Syndrome and all sorts of health related nasties too. The Mooncup eliminates all sanitary waste, and it’s made from medical grade silicone rubber. It is latex-free, hypoallergenic and contains no dyes, bleaches or toxins…but…

I’ll get back to waxing lyrical about the benefits a little later but, for now, I’m going to get right to the ‘but’. The biggest challenge of the Mooncup is getting to grips with your own blood, your own bodily fluids. Bodily fluids. It even sounds gross. In fact, lots of women (and most men) are pretty grossed out by periods. Stiff upper lip. The less said the better. But this slightly squeamish automatic gag reaction does nothing to help women develop a healthy view of their period and does a very good job of lining the pockets of the sanitary protection manufacturers. Periods are a totally normal, actually quite amazing, occurrence that half of the population deal with at some point. I’m not saying it makes them easy. Or pleasant. Try telling me about the beauty of periods when I’m curled in the fetal position in the throes of bad cramps wishing to rip my own womb out. No, they are not easy. But I have to remind myself sometimes that periods are in fact a brilliant thing, part of a miracle of human biology, and I think lots of women would do well to occasionally remember that.

Illustration by June Champoomidole

It may sound odd but the Mooncup has helped me feel better about my period. You see what it actually looks like. How much there is. And it’s not so bad. It makes periods more comfortable and cleaner too. I don’t feel as grossed out by it. In fact, I’d go as far as to say I actually feel more empowered. And the language I use when I talk about it has improved as a result. When I talk about language I don’t mean the euphemisms for period (Aunt Flo, jam rags, etc,), I mean women who are on their periods referring to themselves as ‘crazy’ and ‘mental’. Most women who refer to themselves as ‘mental’ are perfectly sane, thankyouverymuch. Hormones increase, yes, making feelings more intense, but the large majority of women are not ‘mental’. Women have been peddling back from being labelled as crazy for the last 100 years, and likening period- related hormonal changes to a serious psychological illness reinforces the ‘crazy’ stereotype and, along with the squeamish period-related gag reaction, is yet another way that women put themselves down. I know that when women say these things most don’t actually mean that they are having a mental breakdown, or want to section themselves. I’m just not sure about the latent, or not so latent, message that this language portrays, and I wish that there was some more positive, self affirming views in the mix too.

Illustration by Faye West

So, in summary:

• The Mooncup helps lots of women feel better about their periods.
• Its cleaner. More hygienic…there are no pee-soaked strings hanging down to deal with. Its neater too – all tucked away inside until you’re ready to empty it.
• Less chance of DEATH. Not that I’m scaremongering or anything…but there is much lower risk of getting Toxic Shock Syndrome.
• It’s greener. It saves 200,000 tons of sanitary waste from going to landfill every year.
• It’s more comfortable. More attuned to your actual vagina: inserting a wad of dry cotton in a soft, moist vagina is pretty counter-intuitive. Rubber is a much more normal material associated with your nether regions. Rubber + vagina= happy vagina, less likelihood of dryness and thrush etc.
• It’s cheaper. Its costs £21 and lasts for years. The average woman spends £90 a year on sanitary protection.
• It forces you to get to grips and understand your own bodily fluids – in a good way. Don’t gag. Be a grown up.
• The Mooncup people were responsible for the recent brilliant ‘Love your vagina’ ads that caused a bit of stir recently (pro vagina but not in a porno way, hurrah!).

For those still uninitiated, here are some FAQs that I’ve received from friends in the past.

How often do you empty it?
Depends on your flow. Some women are fine emptying it twice a day, some four times a day. It doesn’t need changing as often as a tampon.

What do you do with the blood?
You empty it down the loo, wash the Mooncup under the tap with soap and water then put it back in.

What if I’m in a public loo?
Washing your Mooncup in a public sink might not go down too well, but if you really need too you can wipe it with toilet roll or use a bottle of water to rinse it instead.

Um, isn’t it gross?
It sounds gross but, trust me, you get used to it very quickly and the benefits FAR outweigh any perceived grossness.

How do you put it in, it looks enormous?
You fold it up to about a third of the size to insert it. Yes your fingers go inside a bit. It’s not that bad. To pull it out there is a little tail attached to make it easier (which you can trim to a length that works for you). You can use your pelvic floors to push it down a bit first if that makes it easier. Just a word of warning: when pulling it out, be sure to bend it in at the side to break the suction and then it slides out easily. The first time I tried to use it I didn’t bend it in at the side. Panic ensued and I swear I nearly sucked my insides out. Never. Again.

How do you clean it?
You wash it with soap most times you take it out, and then every couple of periods you boil it in a pan of boiling water or, yes, you can even stick it in the dishwasher (boils any germs away, very hygienic). Another word of warning though, don’t forget about your Mooncup boiling in the pan, or it will explode all over your kitchen, as tweeted by Amelia!

What does it look like?

It looks like this, which is pretty frightening, but once you’ve folded it, it’s about a third of that, not much bigger than a tampon and much smaller than the average penis. Once in it opens up inside it forms a vacuum meaning that leakage is vastly reduced.

So in summary, I’d say that yes, the Mooncup is worth any initial gagging. It really is good.

I may live to regret this, but if you’ve any passionate thoughts (love, hatred, bemusement) do share below…

After a summer hiatus, and now that Summer has firmly shut the door in our faces, the craft column is back, and what better way to celebrate its return than with a retrolicious project that both kids and adults will love?

Potato stamping is something that many of us experienced at school, complete with plastic apron and poster paints. But it’s also brilliant (and quite addictive) post puberty too.

You’ll need

Large potatoes
A sharp knife
Stuff to stamp onto
Paint – for paper and fabric if you would so desire
Newspaper

Illustration by Daniel Williams

More and more people are choosing to shop online, but packages bought online come with a sometimes ridiculous amount of packaging; padded envelopes, tissue paper, plastic and bubble wrap. Finding ways to reuse this packaging rather than throwing it away cuts down on waste, and saves you a bit of dosh too. If you’ve bought anything online recently, or purchased shoes or anything from a posh-ish shop, it is more than likely that your package came with an abundance of tissue paper. It can be customised using potato stamping, turning it into rather splendid wrapping paper.

To begin, etch the outline of your shape onto the potato using a ballpoint pen.

Then, using a small sharp knife, gently cut down directly around your design. Then cut in from the outside, revealing a relief of your design. WATCH YOUR FINGERS! Apparently,according to the below image, I nearly sliced my thumb off (oops) so be careful!

Set up a couple of trays of paint and some newspaper or a wipeable mat as the paint will leak through the tissue paper. A bowl of water to wash the potato between colours would also be useful (or you’ll end up with brown coloured tissue paper- not a pleasant combination) I found you got a better print if you painted the paint onto the stamp directly.

You can be as elaborate or as simple as you want. I tried both an anchor motif and a triangle. Then go crazy with those potato’s.

If you have a potato on the turn this would be a very good use for it.

Apart from wrapping paper, you could also stamp old envelopes and re use them, or create original home made cards. If you use fabric paint instead of poster paint you could print t- shirts, cushion covers, canvas bags….the list goes on.

Happy stamping campers!

If you come up with something stamptastic (sorry), link below so we can have a nosey.

Bike by Mark Taplin

Sorry about that, it is in the listings, possibly you are even reading this after the exhibition has closed in which case HELLO IN THE FUTURE (look out for flying cars, in the London Transport Museum, which would be the appropriate place, just don’t pay the £10 entrance fee in hope of seeing illustrations if they have already gone.)

This is the second collaborative competition venture the Association of Illustrators and the Museum have undertaken. Due to some factors, possibly such as their acquiring of a twitter account since last year this one was considerably more competitive than the last. I have it from the actual woman whose job it was to count them that there were over 3000 entries for the 50 places in the exhibition. Am I still a little bitter that I didn’t get in? Only a little, as the standard of the work that did get in is in general very high indeed.

Life cycles by Kevin Ward

It’s a beautiful show that really exemplifies the amazing wealth and variety of Illustration talent around. Not all of the work was to my taste but given the breadth of styles included that’s not really surprising; the AOI on typically excellent form at celebrating the medium.

Amidst the variety of work from established and unknown artists some trends are discernable; many illustrators have worked in animals either using the London Zoo as an iconic destination or including pigeons or dogs to help out with the green association as this is after all an exhibition exonerating the environmental benefits of cycling in the city (woo – go bikes).

Some pieces like Jove’s beautifully designed utopian poster, Jessid Ford’s gorgeous graphic colours ‘A to B and all the sights in between’ print and Mark Taplin’s lovely single colour classic screen print style image echo the classic transport posters which the London Transport Museum has long loved and displayed and sold on postcards.

the only way to see London by Courtney Lee

Although this was my first visit to the Museum it does seem to have this dual personality. The visiting tourist children who must surely be its main market come for the fun interactive displays, the chance to get photographed driving a routemaster, and apparently the chance to run around and collect holes punched in a gotta catch em all style transport treasure trail. A brand new Boris Bicycle is the centrepiece in the tucked away gallery space where the show is housed and while I was there families and older children in groups often came in, checked off the bike on their list and left again with not more than a passing glance at the art on the walls.

I hope there are people like me and the other lone visitor giving a significant amount of time to the exhibition that also come to the Museum for its other angle – the amazing wealth it has in its association with artists both in projects like Cycling in London and other initiatives like art on the underground which has been going for years and features inspiring new art on underground station walls and in their outstanding collection of classic advertising posters which London Transport has commissioned over the decades. Many of these can be seen adorning souvenirs and postcards in the Museum shop – which happily can be accessed without paying the entrance fee. Perhaps more people would be likely to see this exhibition if it could be accessed separately from the Museum proper at a reduced fee.

Rachel Lillie’s first prize winning entry

Perhaps they could have also chosen a different image other than the winning illustration to use on their posters advertising the show which have been well spread across the city. I don’t wish to say anything against the judges choice or Rachel Lillie’s beautiful piece but as an eye catching image with a wide appeal I think there were many pieces in the show that would have been a better choice.
Evgenia Barinova’s awesome striking poster like piece on wood for example which dominates the far end of the room with its inspirational message ‘if Super Heroes couldn’t fly they’d ride a Bike!’ or Laura Callaghan’s fantastically serene flying cyclists setting a joyful example and clearly having more fun than their tube riding counterparts.

Freewheel by Laura Callaghan

There are things that make illustration itself, rather than fine art, and things that make it great. Looking at their selection of winners the AOI clearly are big fans of the medium’s capacity for a sort of dualistic immediacy – a leaf which is also a map, an aerial view which is also a bicycle and nature and cyclists incorporated into a beautiful decorative inclusive layout in the tradition of a William Morris wallpaper. (I’d quite like a Mia Nilsson wallpaper actually – anyone from Habitat buying reading?). They seem to have favoured visual sense and simple dense colour over drawing or realism. This is an ideal in illustration that I think some people seem to put on a bit of a pedestal but as I said before it is far from the only style on show.

close up of Mia Nillson’s winning artwork

Another quality of illustration – it’s relationship with and commentary on popular culture is also much in evidence here; Jamie Wieck’s hilarious the joy of cycling being an obvious standout with subtler cultural references in Patrick O’leary’s mods on push bikes instead of scooters and Ross Crawford’s lovely cockney rhyming poster combining the classic and bang up to date cultural takeoff (blessedly does not actually include the over used ‘keep calm and…’). ‘Many Artists Who Do One Thing’s awesome circus graffiti style poster is cheeky but to the point – cycling is fun, and a little bit revolutionary.

The Joy of Cycling by Jamie Wieck

Look after your Jam tart by Ross Crawford

Also present are our gorgeous children’s book style contingent with their universal appeal; Kevin Ward’s fantastic animal charactrers in retro colours(?) and Courtney Lee Bourdman’s happy happy tourists on their double decker bicycle bus (clearly uniting the Museum’s selling points perfectly); Catherine Denvir combines digital techniques for a more tongue in cheek surreal childish quality.

Speed Cycling by IGnjat Reljic Djuric

The strong classic illustrative style of simple expressive drawing is exemplified by Ignjat Reljic Djuric’s perfectly balanced piece where the cyclist seems like a plucky underdog to the epic red buildings; old favourite Belle Mellor provides a fantastically idiosyncratic interpretation although not the only illustrator to use London landmarks as hats (make of that what you will) – David Hughes also does this with as ever lovely ink lettering and layout. Judit Ferencz’s hand drawn image makes excellent use of space and Alex Bitskoff also uses layout magnificently (although not simply) with his richly coloured city wave erupting into the clean environmental space.

allways leisurely with Bicycle by Judit Ferencz

One of the things I like about illustration is that in this medium quick simple execution and epic complex work are equally as valid. What matters in an illustration is the impact and the joy and the communication. And illustrators can be amazingly skilled at thinking of new conceptual and exciting ways of presenting the same idea – their bread and butter work is often sexing up the figures in business magazines after all. Some of these pieces clearly got in to the final 50 for the idea used, others for the execution.

what’s that? you’ve snuck in your own unsuccesful entry to the competition Jenny Robins? cheeky bint.

I’ve not even talked about my very favourite school of illustration present in Cycling in London! – I love me some collage and there are fantastic examples in the work of Alison Bell whose lovely retro collage and print techniques clearly echoes the recent Varoom feature on the resurgence of the medium (how could they not include it then?); Lianne Harrison makes cool creepy bus-stop characters and Tracy Long’s tiny magazine faces on fancifull animal cyclists stole my heart, although I don’t think St Paul’s in the background adds anything. I imagine she added it to fit the brief about Cycling in London but looking at what else has got through I think she could have got away without it.

Goodbye to the Hustle and Bustle by Lianne Harrison

Eye Eye around London by Tracy Long’

I was running out of time before closing but just had time to check out Georgina Brookes’ awesome cutouty graphic layering and Clayton Junior’s ace layout and colours employing a classic illustration immediate impact swap technique.

I had to leave through a secret staircase and the Museum employee waiting to lock up behind me smiled beautifully saying “interesting exhibition isn’t it?”
Well yes, it most definitely is, but the wording of the comment shows the attitude that this is something unusual is still the norm. I go to more illustration exhibitions than fine art ones, and in this world it’s easy to forget that to most people it’s still a bit of a non-concept. (you’re an illustrator eh? Cartoons? No? Book covers then? – sound familiar?) And good on the LTM for putting on projects like this but the way it’s presented on the posters and tucked away at the back of the museum still seem to me to reinforce it’s esotericness. Which is just a little sad. But let’s not end on a down note. Maybe illustration is like the poor relation of art – but is not the bicycle the poor relation of the car? And which is cooler, greener more, you know, government endorsed?

On your bike kids.

I have to honestly admit that I don’t really THINK about sustainability in my everyday life. I even recycle without thinking because it is such a natural process to me. You don’t consciously think about why you drink tea from a cup and not from a bowl or why you pee into the toilet and not into the basin.  
I think you’re only truly sustainable when it’s a part of your way of life, just like a diet is pointless unless you actually change your lifestyle and habits. In keeping with this, I came across a test with a perfectly relevant name: “My Habbit“. You can check out your own carbon footprint and you might be surprised at how easy it is to change really small habits. 

Whilst taking the test it visualises your carbon footprint in the form of a strange and creepy semi-alien computer-generated human body. Proportionally distorting a human’s body parts in order to visualise your disproportionate use, you work your way through the different stages of sustainability. For instance, if you use a lot of electricity, you head starts to look more and more like a skeleton. The more meat you eat, the fatter your belly gets. Electricity and gas expands your hands, travel expands your feet until it looks like an almost bursting balloon. Mine looked pretty normal at the end, but it still had suggestions for me to better myself. But how did I even come across this test? 

“So, a guy came into the office today to borrow some of our paper, which was recycled and said ‘So are you trying to save the world or summin?’ (sic) to which I wanted to start replying but by the time I said ‘Um..’ he said ‘Then stop driving!’ I obviously replied ‘I don’t drive’ and he said ‘Oh’ and walked off. What’s the dude hassling me for?” 
This is a snippet of a conversation I had during dinner today, where it transpired that me being a vegetarian and not having a car actually makes me “pretty green” according to a test my partner had taken during the workshop he held at the “Sustainable Futures” exhibition at the Design Museum. I was immediately intrigued. This may have been mainly due to the fact that I was fairly certain I was going to come out of the other end of the tunnel with a result to be proud of (aka something to show off about).  

Shopping locally for fabric, illustrated by Naomi Law

I already knew some of the reasons that were going to be to my advantage. I work from home, which means that in average, I use the underground only once a week for meetings or events in town. I have only travelled by plane once in the past year (last November, in fact), which is highly unusual and mainly down to the fact that work has happily consumed all my time. Either way, I knew it was going to make me look good in the test. I walk to the shops, and buy most of my food and fabric (I am a fashion designer) in the local market where things are mainly locally sourced. I’m very lazy when it comes to anything that is essential to life such as sleep, eating and washing. That’s only of advantage because I own a lot of clothes, which means I very rarely have to actually wash any of them. My washing machine is extremely underused.  

Furthermore, since we’re on the subject of big white goods, I don’t own a dishwasher or tumble dryer or any such machinery. I recycle everything from paper snippets to plastic to glass to fabric. I would say “tins” but I don’t really use them. As I mentioned before, most my food moves directly from the bowl of vegetables of the farmer’s table into my Longchamp shopping bag into my vegetable drawer. Another point that I knew was going to help me look good in this test was the fact that I’m a vegetarian. Apparently, that makes a difference although I’m still not quite sure why. Surely any food needs to be transported, worked on? Do feel free to enlighten me if you know. 

Returning to the subject of technical items, I don’t watch TV. I have a TV set for watching a DVD every now and then, but I usually prefer to work, and the TV is of course unplugged when I don’t use it because otherwise it makes a very annoying humming noise when it’s on standby. I unplug my printers, sewing machines, hair straighteners etc when I’m not using them.

People who don’t live with me would never believe it, but I’d rather look like a couch potato wearing three jackets (I’m at home, right?) than turn on the heating unnecessarily. In fact, the heating is completely switched off until the temperature drops below 10 degrees Celsius for more than a week, which doesn’t make me very popular with my housemates.  

We were given some free sustainable light bulbs when we last switched gas and electricity companies, which we use throughout the house and half of the fluorescent light bulbs we have in our office have burned out and we are too lazy to replace them.

Shopping for clothes, illustrated by Zarina Liew

This one is a big deal, but not a topic that gave me any extra credit during the test. About 80% of my wardrobe (including my shoes) is either second hand, vintage or passed on in some form or another through eBay, TK Maxx, in the form of presents from family and friends, inherited pieces, charity shops etc. This does not, however, mean that I don’t indulge my fashion sense, as a quick peek into the style section of my website will confirm. 

I don’t listen to the radio, I don’t have a CD player or stereo because I have all my music on my Mac and iPhone – who knew being this non-nostalgic about music, could turn into a blessing? 

We have an agreement with our landlord who sends round a gardener every two months. Officially, any carbon footprint they amass during their work is technically not mine, so I am not counting it. The grass is yellow from the few days of “heat” this lame English summer had, but I don’t really see that as my responsibility and as far as I can tell, I don’t think the gardeners ever water the grass – they simply cut it even shorter and dryer and pick up the leaves. 

Some of the questions in the test were difficult. For instance, I had to look up which type of light bulbs we actually use. They cleverly adjust the optimum “habit” you could have at the end and suggest ways in which you can better yourself, even if your carbon emission is as low as one could realistically imagine. 

However, there were aspects of importance that were not quite taken into consideration. A big issue, which could tip someone’s carbon print (especially among us fashionistas and fashionistos, eh?)  is our shopping and consumption habits beyond mere primary necessity (food). Do you buy online? Are your purchases shipped or flown from overseas or do you make sure buy locally? Do you shop in chain supermarkets or local markets? How much stuff do you own? Do you buy from Primark or second hand? Do you buy per trend and season or do you invest in pieces that you have worn for decades? Do you tend to consume actual objects such as electric equipment, decorative items, clothing or something altogether different? 

Using recycled paper, illustrated by Emma Block, using recycled paper!

There are also questions relating to your profession that are not taken into consideration at all. For instance, the test asks you whether you use a printer at home, but not whether you use a printer at work. How much paper do you use and waste, knowing you’re not paying for it? I’ll forgive them for not asking office-related questions, though, as this could get very detailed and complex. But what about mobile phones? No sign of their impact.

Having an iPhone, which I use for work, means I charge my phone up a lot more often than, say, someone who works in a shop and turns theirs off for most of the day. As anybody who owns an iPhone knows, as much as we love them – the battery of the iPhone is abysmal. It needs charging ALL the time. Surely the test should be asking about the different phones one has, the same way they asked about what type of TV I own? On the other hand, I charge my iPhone via my laptop – this means less electricity is used. You can see, the questions can be quite endless, but an essential acknowledgement of such basics would have improved the test. 
Many of my friends and colleagues are writers or need to write in some form or another. When you do your writing, do you do it online or offline? That sounds like it would make no difference, but it does. Here’s a good illustrating example, which has astounded quite a lot of people when I’ve mentioned it. 

Energy in the kitchen, illustrated by Gemma Randall

One of the questions in the questionnaire is how often you boil the kettle. Did you know that every time you do a search on google it uses as much electricity and power from the mighty google servers as it does to boil a full kettle? A question in the test, if I have had any say, should have been “Do you look up the tiniest question on google rather than trying to think that second longer in case you remember?” Do you maybe have a real life dictionary (oh wonder and glory), which can help you just as much? Yes, one should consider the production cost of making said book, but for the sake of the argument, let’s assume it’s a vintage book, which still holds perfectly updated descriptions of most words we know. If it doesn’t, you can STILL use Google, Wikipedia or an online dictionary. But not doing so would immediately reduce your carbon footprint more than you think… 

I am a great believer in the fact that until something is accepted as normal, it has not really been overcome. Until it is, the obstacle of integration is not complete. I feel this is the way with sustainability. I grew up with it, so it was quite strange for me to see what fuss people made about being sustainable – it was new to me. Once people embrace it as part of their lives, it will be a lot easier. You hear campaigns telling you to “be aware” and “do your part” as if most of these acts weren’t perfectly logical. I disagree. Sure, some people just don’t admit to perfectly basic knowledge being obvious, and need those hints and tips, and none of us are perfect and continue to be educated. However, the obsession of making recycling something to be conscious about is not going to help. Only once it’s truly and easily integrated into our lives in a manner that is natural to participate in will sustainability really be standard practice.

Perhaps its because I’m getting older, perhaps I’m becoming more eccentric or perhaps its one too many glasses of wine but I am becoming increasingly intolerant of waste. The latest object of my ‘waste rage’ is envelopes. I am ‘online billed’ to my eyeballs, but I still seem to receive an avalanche of junk mail and catalogues for companies I’ve never heard of through the post. Its probably Facebook’s fault; selling my soul to Identity Theft R Us and IWillSpamYouToTears.com.

But before I retreat into an envelope and Facebook induced pit of fury, I’ll bring this baby back to the point.

What to do with those pesky envelopes?

According to the folk at Green Box Day the average British family throws away 6 trees worth of paper in their household bin a year. Thats 120 trees over 20 years, which is, like, a small forest. Or something. Obviously reducing the amount of paper we bring home is the best thing, but finding ways to reuse the stuff is the next best thing.

Before you recycle (or chuck away, tut tut) your next envelope, look closely at it. Envelopes have a rather nice graphic blue or black pattern lining the inside. Once you start noticing, I warn you its a slippery slope. You may find yourself rating companies according to the graphics they choose for the inside of their envelopes. Tate, for examples get top marks in my book, but HSBC are at the bottom of the cool envelope lining charts.

These small graphic patterns would lend themselves well to something small… like muffin toppers. Or cake bunting. Don’t you see?! (ahem)

You will need

Old envelopes
Scissors
Ruler and pencil
Needle and thread
Cocktail sticks
Pritt stick

Firstly, make a stencil of the flag shape of your choice, trace onto the envelope several times and cut them out.

Use a bit of glue to wrap the flag around a cocktail stick.

Stick in to some perfectly formed muffins (like these stupidly easy banana muffins I made at the weekend)

They look tres cute, no?

An alternative to muffin toppers is a string of mini paper envelope bunting.

Cut out some tiny triangles, and using a needle and thread, pierce the triangles twice with the needle. Prepare for ‘small pain’ rage.

Then string them together.

Or if all that is all a bit pointless and over the top for you (bah humbug), you could just save them for your shopping lists. Just cut off the gummy bits, make a hole in the corner and tie them together. A free, self replenishing notepad, handy for to do lists and passive aggressive notes to housemates and other halves.

Whilst researching for this article, I realized that I can register my address at the mail preference register to stop junk mail. My level of excitement about this is unequaled. Go forth and experience the joy.

This column attempts to provide lovely ways to recycle junk into useful and beautiful things. If you have had a genius recycling idea or if you are stuck with something you don’t want to chuck away, leave a comment and let me know! I may feature your idea or I will try and come up with a solution to your recycling conundrum.

P.s I am currently trying to think of a decent name for this feature. Any suggestions warmly welcomed.

It’s hot. The air – swimming through the dawning sun’s flare, dyed glowing green by its battle through dew-soaked tent skin – is cloaked by a comforting, mossy smell. Beyond the walls of the glowing nylon pocket, gentle phrases grumble towards a sea of bubbling indecipherable expressions, the smooth surface sound only broken by the occasional questioning voice of a slowly rising zip. Until… from a stage in a distant field…

“Dumph! Dumph! Dumph! Dumph! -”
“Yeah, mutherFUCKERS! Get the FUCK UUUP!”

Good morning, festivalgoer. Welcome to your long saved-for long weekend of bottle torpedo avoidance, flaming portaloo dousing and plastic meals dished up in polystyrene boxes.

But it doesn’t have to be this way. Steadily over the past few years, the major festival has been wrestled from the clutches of beer brands and mobile phone companies, and sent lolloping over can-strewn fields in search of a little cultural convalescence. It has emerged in such guises as the Hay Festival of Literature and the Arts, which welcomes its first visitors this week in the breathtaking Brecon Beacons National Park. Guided by the ambition to “share new visions of the world, and to do that incredibly sexy thing – to renew our sense of wonder”, the Hay Festival calls on comedians, writers, theatrical performers and musicians to deliver a 10-day programme of events that inspire, entertain and provide plenty of opportunities for wholesome escapism.

Photography by Finn Beales

Hay’s series of environment-related events include a forum on the better use of existing resources, agriculture and food sustainability workshops, and river walks; literary additions count highlights such as photographer Don McCullen in discussion with journalist Rosie Boycott, and talks from Bill Bryson, Lynn Barber and Alain De Botton; and the stage and screen element sees site-specific performances and short films played out across Hay.

The Hay Fever programme for kids plays host to the likes of Quentin Blake and Aardman Animations‘ Peter Lord, and the Rocks Riffs Guitar Workshop, Film Making in a Day, Beat-Matching and Scratching Workshop and farm visits are destined to shape a future generation of festivalgoers (and creators) with their expectations set far above late-night silent discos and stadium sell-out headliners with their osteopath on speed-dial.

The festival runs until Sunday 6th June.